Sometimes when you crawl out of the cocoon and stretch your wings you take a nose dive….Ouch… Yeah, that is happening right now. I had a few days of feeling fantastic and then I crashed and burned in a way that made me feel I was back to December 15th all over again. I sometimes wish I was not so sensitive but it is who I am. I cannot just stop loving people. Why is it that those who are able to walk around like robots and have no feelings are considered normal and those of us who struggle with feelings are considered crazy. I am not crazy I am human with deep emotions. When I love I truly love. When I hate…well I have to say it goes deep to the bone. That however rarely happens except in cases where I feel someone has purposely set out to destroy something I had or to hurt my family. But hate can eat you alive and I have been carrying some. I do need to let go of that and I am working on it.
So I am trying to clean up my wings right now…they are a bit dirty and bent. I feel like I have no energy or motivation. I need something in my life that makes me feel fulfilled. My dreams may never make it off the ground but I have some. I just have to breath some life into them.