I am on day two of a self imposed exile from everything. I have immune issues. I had H1N1 in 2009 and it was pretty horrible. This they say is worse. Because I already catch every damn thing that comes around I cannot take any chances. So yesterday I got the last of the stuff I felt I needed and I headed home with the idea that I am not leaving the house for at least 10 – 14 days…more if my work will allow me to work from home. The reason I got H1N1 in 2009 had to do with the fact that I work on a campus. It is a dangerous place to be when these things go down. People are traveling from all over the US and the world and are many times in close quarters with each other. I am so glad that my university made the choice to go to online instruction. The only thing I am wondering about is what about the staff? As of yet there has been no instruction for staff about what to do except…come to work. I was lucky. I had vacation planned for this week. I was supposed to travel to Minneapolis and present at Paganicon but it was cancelled. So I am home and hopefully I have not been exposed.
Fear, that is what is giving me the most problem. Every time I sniffle a little, every time I feel like I might sneeze or feel a tickle in my throat I think…here we go. It is on my mind constantly. I am not allowing any visitors to my house and the only person I am going to see the next 10 days or so is my housemate who is hiding away in his part of the house in fear too. I am not used to be alone like this. In addition I just had a major change in my life and the person I have spent the majority of my time with over the last year and a half is no longer here. So I am truly on a hermits journey at this time. I plan on making it a spiritual journey to prepare me for an upcoming initiation and dedication. The rest of my life is going to be dedicated to my spiritual path as a priestess and chaplain.
So what about Rochester? Well, we have two confirmed cases as of right now. Colleges are going online. Monroe county schools have just closed. Some people are still in denial and are saying “fuck this, I am going out anyway” I worry that this attitude will make things worse. The grocery stores are getting emptied out. There is no chicken. The toilet paper is all gone. There is no hand sanitizer. But maybe this will begin to make people realize that we really need each other. I hope so. When I see pictures of lines of people with an entire cart of toilet paper I cannot help but wonder where does this selfishness come from? Is it fear? Insecurity that there will never be anymore? What about the elderly person who lives alone who has to try and get those supplies but they are all gone, taken by younger healthier people. We cannot go on living in our own world and never knowing our neighbor. I hope to come out of this a different country and a different world. There is a Facebook group in our city that is helping each other and I was invited to join it. People are offering to bring things to people who need it. Those who have extra are letting the group know. This is how it should be. It gives me hope.